Just one more pill.
Just one more cut.
Just one more sip of
the burning sensation in my throat.
Just one more smile.
One more breath.
But I can’t fucking do this. I’m a coward. I’m
to fucking gutless to end my own life. It always only results in some red lines
on my arm. Sometimes some tears. But mostly just numbness. Emptiness. Just
nothing.
I’m always hoping I just wouldn’t wake up the
next morning. Just die in my own sleep. Or get hit by a truck. But I don’t want
anyone being responsible for my death. I want to be the only one that is
responsible for my death. But I will never be the only one. Maybe it’s this
fucked up society that makes my life a living hell. Maybe it’s those false
friends. Or just everything at once.
I can’t do this. I can’t take anymore. I just
want to die already. But I won’t.
Still no one knows how bad I am. But why should
they know. They don’t even care. Nobody cares. I’m fucking worthless. A waste
of space. I hate me. I hate everything about myself. I hate myself for still
being here.
Please, someone. Release me from all of this.